Self Love

Hello.

This week, I decided to really open up to you guys. I'm not really an open person, and I struggle to find an accurate way of expressing myself, especially on topics like this. But I need to talk about it, I need to show people that no one is alone and everyone has battles of their own, that's what happens in life.

This is also an aspect of this blog which I want to maintain as a regular topic, talking to you all about these topical issues to bring light to the fact that they happen to everyone, no matter what their situation.

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In our world today, we're surrounded by media; the internet, magazines, movies, posters, music, billboards, newspapers... the works; and somehow, we are pressured into believing that being influenced by this media is wrong. We are forced to drive towards a bigger butt and a thinner waist. We are forced to constantly feel guilty about that pizza we just ate because no one plasters their Instagram with them eating pizza. We are forced to stand in front of a mirror and judge everything we see. In our world today, teenagers of all shapes and sizes feel unwanted and unwelcome, because they don't look like the photoshopped images and videos on our computers, mobile phones, tablets and TV screens.

Over the past few weeks, since the end of 2016, I have been completely focussing on my body and my health. Working out, exercising and eating less is a motto that I have been abiding by, and even after noticing it's wrong, I'm unable to stop. Some of the goals I have in my life, both short and long term, revolve around my appearance and improving the person I am, and I have been so hard on myself lately in order to try and achieve them.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have battles, mainly with myself. I have been getting a lot of comments lately, from friends and strangers, mentioning my weight, or my size, or my strength, or my height. What I find strange is the words they say don't correlate or connect to the words that are on repeat inside my mind when I see myself in a photo, or in the mirror.

I have insecurities, we all do, and I feel like people become oblivious and insensitive to that. Before commenting on someone else's appearance, realise that, just like you and me, they will most likely be struggling with an insecurity or two, and your comment could make or break them.

I hope your New Years resolutions are made because of your own personal benefit, and not to impress or attain attention from others. In this society, everyone's fighting for themselves and their own social rankings, and no one cares about your achievements. Do what you want, but make sure what you do is for you. No one's praise or acceptance can outrank that of your own, so push yourself until you are happy being you.

In tough times like these, what I'm experiencing with myself at the moment, it's important that I express it to the world. This is not written to obtain compliments of any sort, or even comfort or approval, it's merely to prove that everyone of all shapes and sizes can periodically dislike who they are, due to the influences of others. I constantly compare myself to other people, a terrible habit I know, and one I need to get out of. At this time, to win this battle, I need to continue doing what makes me happy, so I can be comfortable in my own skin.

Thank you guys for reading this, and I'm so sorry how serious this post was. I just wanted it to be realistic.

Please reach out to me if you ever need someone to talk to, all my links are at the bottom of all my posts. 

How are you guys? Keep your head up for as long as you can if you're not feeling the best. This is my last blog post of being 15! I turn 16 this coming Friday... super excited!!!

I'll see you all next Sunday, share this around, leave a comment and subscribe to this blog for email notifications when I next post.

Sending love,

Bella x

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